In the entertainment business, they say that talent and perseverance are important but it’s also “all about who you know.”
Being successful with women is kind of the same.
You may have friends or acquaintances who could really help you with women. A lot.
You may also have friends who are ruining your love life without even knowing it.
These “friends” can actually increase your chances for rejection with new women.
What’s the takeaway here? Simple.
If you want more success with women, hang out with the friends who help.
Avoid or rehabilitate the friends who don’t.
Here are the top four “frenemies” who can ruin your chances with new women:
1. The Downer
He’s always depressed and you have to practically beg him to come out with you somewhere.
Whether you’re going to trivia night at the pub or grabbing food at a restaurant, you can’t count on him when there’s a group of women to be approached.
Why is he so depressing when it comes to women?
Because, he believes that attractive women only want guys who are rich and/or very good looking.
This type of buddy most definitely has not read this article here on the strange truth about looks, money, and attraction (and why he is so wrong).
He’s a terrible wingman because he’ll drag his negativity about past women into interactions with future women.
Even if one girl in a group likes you, her friends may drag her away just to get away from your downer of a buddy.
Lesson: Hang out with the Downer in private, not in public where you might meet new women.
2. The Dateless Know-It-All
You probably have at least one friend or acquaintance that falls into this category.
Yes, he’s read tons of articles online about picking up women. He claims he understands the “psychology of the female mind” much better than you do.
He’s always very authoritative during conversations about “what women want” but there’s one problem…
He doesn’t get girls.
He gets little attention from women. No phone numbers or emails. No dates. Nothing.
It’s always funny for me how little talk I hear about women from my buddies who are good with women.
That’s because they are too busy talking to women and less busy analyzing them.
Lesson: Hang out with guys who take action with women and avoid the ones that don’t.
3. The Style Challenged
He’s wearing dirty sneakers or old, scuffed dress shoes with jeans that look 20 years out of style.
Maybe he even suffers from some of the top ten common grooming mistakes of men.
He’s a great guy and a loyal friend.
You just don’t want him with you when you’re meeting new women.
Pretty ruthless, right?
Maybe, but we don’t live in a world where everyone sings Kum Ba Yah and looks for “inner beauty” first and foremost.
A woman’s looks matter to you and yours to her. If she and her friends spent hours looking good they probably hope to meet guys who also take care of themselves too – even if just a little.
If you are well-dressed and groomed and your buddy looks a little “rough around the edges,” your combined appeal drops.
Lesson: Help your style and grooming challenged buddies change and they’ll make better wingmen.
4. The Jealous Wingman
It’s not impossible that your buddy will also be attracted to a woman you’re pursuing.
Of course, if you follow the basic laws of a wingman, you know that a wingman’s number one job is to help his buddy with the new woman.
Still, I’ve seen many guys break this protocol due to jealousy.
Their jealousy usually comes out in these ways:
- He shares unflattering stories or facts about you
- He hits on a woman you are pursuing
- He tries to undermine you in anyway
Usually this type of behavior comes from an acquaintance or friend of a friend.
How do you handle it? Simple.
If a guy is hurting your chances with a woman, pull him aside privately and ask him to stop what he’s doing.
Honestly, a lot of guys turn into jealous wingman just because of the male instinct to compete. They may not even know what they are doing at the time.
Lesson: Politely saying, “Hey man, I like her and I was here first. Can you just lay off?” can neutralize most jealous wingmen.
What You Need to Remember
- Surrounding yourself with guys who are good with women makes you better with women
- Spend more time meeting new women with guys who speak well of you
- Spend less time meeting women with guys who are negative or jealous
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